How To Boil An Egg (and Why)

tomato timer
A Tomato Can Be Modified To Help Us Boil Eggs

Why is it good to boil an egg?

  • It’s a good way to eat an egg
  • It’s probably pretty good for you
  • Suitable for vegetarians (ovo-type)/omnivores/carnivores (Not vegans – due to hen enslavement)
  • Gluten free, if that’s a thing for you
  • It’s FUN

Of course, if you don’t like eggs, then this is probably of no interest, unless you like science and suspense and drama and a classic tale of love in dark times, in which case, read on…

Ingredients/things needed:

  • Egg or eggs, from a chicken or chickens
  • Water
  • Saucepan
  • Thermal energy source

Method/things that should happen:

  • Place your egg/s in the empty saucepan
  • Submerse egg/s in cold water by pouring water onto them
  • Stop pouring water when the egg/s are about 2cm or even up to an inch below the surface
  • Place the saucepan on the thermal energy source and turn it on so as to heat up the water
  • Do not put a lid on the saucepan
  • Wait for several minutes, how long exactly is not important, but be ready for action

Now, this is the really good part.  Things start to get exciting.  The water is about to boil.  This is not something that you want to allow to continue to happen for too long.  You need to be prepared to terminate the boil.  This is very important.

You will notice through the cooking process that small bubbles rise to the surface and steam will appear, and then, as the water gets hotter and hotter, the eggs may begin to move and maybe even rattle a bit.  It’s close now.  Boiling is imminent.

The air in the kitchen is electric.  Bigger bubbles are rising to the surface.  It seems that time is standing still, and you wonder how long can water simmer before it spills over into a full rolling boil?  How long?

And then, you are confronted with this:

boiling eggs
It’s Gonna Blow!

That’s right – the water is boiling.  It’s 100 degrees celsius in there!

But now is not the time to stand in awe of physics and nature.  No.  Now is a time to spring into action, and be a man.  Or a woman.  Or whatever you so happen to be at the time.  Just be it.  DO something.

What is that something?

Method/things that should happen (continued):

  • Turn off the thermal energy source
  • Place a lid on the saucepan
  • Stand back
  • Immediately set a timer for 13 minutes (*)
  • Wait

Now comes the sabbath of the egg boiler.  A time of rest and contemplation.  Looking back on a job well done.  You’ve boiled an egg, or eggs.  Bloody well done!

But the absolute best bit is yet to come – enjoying the fruits of your chicken’s loins.

When the timer sounds, inundate your egg/s in their saucepan with cold running water to take most of the heat away from the newly-boiled egg/s.  Shell them.  Eat them.

I like to cut my eggs down the middle lengthways, and just eat them straight away if I’m hungry.

eggs split
Presentation Is Not So Important When Nobody Is Looking

It’s always good to add a pinch of sea salt and some cracked black pepper to taste.  Sometimes, like tonight, I’ll add a little dob of Rosella brand fruit chutney.  Just because.  You can also do the dob with chili sauce or ketchup or whatever suits your desires.

garnished eggs
Fit For A King, Or Anybody Who Feels Like It, Really

 

(*) I do 13 minutes, because that results in a just-firm yolk, which means that the entire egg has been boiled, but not boiled into a dry yellow puff inside a white rubber ball.  If you like that better, add 2 or 3 minutes to the timer.  If you’re the opposite, take 2 or 3, or 5 or 6 minutes off the timer, depending on how soft and raw and un-boiled you like your yolks.

Yours in the un-fertilised ova of living dinosaurs,

Wick Burner

 

Images: All images original and new today from my kitchen!

Eggs: Eggs courtesy of Daisy, Salt, and Pepper

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4 thoughts on “How To Boil An Egg (and Why)

  1. 13 minutes. Me too. Also, a watched pot does boil. I’ve done the drill personally. It takes almost 7 minutes to bring cold water with eggs to a rolling boil. Invest twenty minutes into the boiling of eggs exercise and there you go. I like to mix my boiled eggs with mayo and Cholula Brand hot sauce. Hecho en Mexico by the by. Hmmm, I’m hungry so it’s egg boiling time…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Great minds!

      I love to destroy old adages by hovering over the pot, staring into it, and patiently waiting for the wisdom of idiots to be proven wrong right before my eyes.

      Mmmm, Cholula… I’m going to see if any of that makes it to Oz…

      Like

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